Navigating Back-to-School Anxiety for Parents of Students with Learning Differences
As the new school year dawns, the air is filled with a palpable sense of excitement and anticipation. However, for parents of children who learn differently, and those with Individualized Education Programs (IEPs) or 504 Plans, this time can be tinged with a unique blend of hope and anxiety. The transition back to school often comes with a host of questions and concerns, but rest assured, you're not alone in your journey. I get it! I’ve walked in your shoes, year after year since my daughter’s first year of school. In this article, I delve into the world of back-to-school anxiety from the perspective of a parent supporting a child with what I fondly refer to as “wrinkles in their learning profile.”
Coping Strategies for Parents:
While the challenges of the new school year can indeed be daunting, there are strategies that parents can employ to navigate this journey with confidence and resilience:
1. Educate Yourself: Knowledge is power. Familiarize yourself with your child's IEP, their specific learning differences, and the available resources and support within their school and outside of their school. Ask for your student’s academic schedule and also their schedule which outlines their specialized or IEP support---overlay the two schedules to ensure your student isn’t missing any classes or opportunities that they shouldn’t be missing (e.g., recess, art class, music class, etc.).
2. Open Dialogue: Maintain open and ongoing communication with your child. Encourage them to express their feelings and concerns about school. Questions you can ask your child include: What was the most interesting thing your teacher said to you today? Who are the kids you talk most to in your classes? Which kids were sitting near you at lunch?
3. Collaborate with Educators: Build strong partnerships with teachers and school staff. Share insights about your child's needs and preferences and work together to create a supportive environment. For example, consider creating a “binder system” for your student to use, where each subject or class has a section/divider---encourage teachers to use this to share notes back and forth with you regarding your student’s day, feedback, and a way to track action items.
4. Establish Routines: Create structured routines at home to ease the transition from summer to school. Predictability can reduce anxiety. Give your kids limited choices, as this will help to build routine, predictability and will provide them with agency in their day. For example, do you want to wear your hair in a ponytail or would you rather brush it out and wear it long today? Pretty soon your child will start getting ready in the morning on their own and this is reason to celebrate them!
5. Self-Care: Prioritize YOUR self-care. Taking care of your own physical and emotional well-being is essential to provide the support your child needs. When my kids were younger, my husband and I literally scheduled breakfast dates into our week, as we knew we’d be too tired to go out on the weekends. Don’t be afraid to book that manicure or a walk with a friend….you deserve it!
6. Support Networks: Seek support from parent support groups or organizations that specialize in learning differences. Sharing experiences and advice with others who have walked a similar path can be incredibly reassuring. One of my best supporters was my “Working Women’s Dinner Group” and we gathered monthly over dinner at local restaurants to discuss all that we were balancing. Find your tribe and don’t be afraid to lean on them!
7. Celebrate Progress: Recognize and celebrate your child's achievements, no matter how small. Don’t be afraid to celebrate everything! People thrive with positive reinforcement and they wither with criticism. Praising your child’s strengths will boost their confidence and motivation and watch how quickly they will reach their full potential!
8. Empower Your Child: Encourage self-advocacy in your child. As your student ages up, it’s critical that you talk about how they learn best, their strengths and their opportunities for development. Socialize and normalize their learning profile WITH them so they too can feel comfortable talking about who they are as a learner and a person. By doing so, you are teaching them to express their needs and preferences to teachers and peers.
9. Professional Guidance: Don't hesitate to seek professional guidance from counselors, therapists, or clinical specialists if you or your child are struggling with anxiety. Speak to your child’s pediatrician, as often they are a helpful first step for both you and your child. The longer you let anxiety or any sort of mental or physical health condition go without intervention, the harder it can be to recover.
10. Time for Grace: Remember that progress may not always be linear. Be patient and flexible in your approach, adjusting strategies as needed. Now is the time to be kind to yourself as a parent, and to your child. It’s okay to acknowledge that this IS hard and that’s okay! Give yourself grace…..you’ve got this!
There is no denying that the start of a new school year can be a challenging time, but it's also an opportunity for growth and learning. With the right support, understanding, and strategies in place, parents can navigate back-to-school anxiety and empower their children to thrive academically and socially. Remember, you're not alone in this journey, and there is a community of support ready to help you and your child succeed.
We’re happy to be that extra layer of support as you and your family find the best place for your student! What are you most looking forward to this school year?